Being in a healthy relationship should feel safe, respectful, and supportive. But sometimes, what looks like love or care at first can slowly shift into something much darker — dating violence. Whether you’re navigating your first serious relationship or are years into dating, understanding the red flags of dating violence is crucial for your physical and emotional well-being.
At Pregnancy Resources of Abilene, we care about your whole health — including the emotional and relational aspects of your life. Alongside free pregnancy tests, ultrasounds, and parenting classes, our Licensed Professional Counselors are available to help you recognize and respond to relationship stress, abuse, and other emotional challenges. No matter your situation, you don’t have to go through it alone.
What Is Dating Violence?
Dating violence refers to abusive or controlling behavior between romantic partners or people dating one another. It can be physical, emotional, psychological, verbal, or sexual. The impact isn’t always obvious at first — some signs are subtle or dismissed as “normal relationship drama.” But abuse is not normal — and early recognition makes getting help easier and safer.
Key Red Flags to Watch For
Here are some of the most common warning signs that a relationship may be turning unhealthy or dangerous:
1. Controlling Behavior
If your partner insists on knowing where you are, who you’re with, or monitors your social media accounts, that’s a sign of control, not concern. Healthy relationships have trust, not surveillance.
2. Isolating You from Friends or Family
A partner who tries to separate you from your support systems — friends, family, or community — is creating dependency. Isolation is a common tactic in abusive relationships.
3. Intense Jealousy or Anger
While everyone feels jealousy at times, excessive jealousy accompanied by blame, outbursts, or punishment is unhealthy. This can escalate into more harmful behavior.
4. Verbal Abuse or Threats
Name-calling, shouting, shaming, or threatening you — whether about your safety or emotional wellbeing — are serious red flags. Verbal abuse wears down confidence and can precede more dangerous actions.
5. Physical Violence or Threats
This includes hitting, pushing, restraining, or threatening bodily harm in any form. Even minor physical aggression is a major warning sign. If there’s any question of safety, get help immediately.
6. Blaming You for Their Behavior
An abusive partner will often twist the truth, making you feel at fault for their actions or emotions. Gaslighting — making you doubt your own reality — is a form of emotional abuse.
Why It’s Often Hard to Recognize Abuse
Abusive patterns can begin slowly. Sometimes a partner apologizes after hurtful behavior, brings gifts, or swears it won’t happen again. This cycle of harm and reconciliation can feel confusing and make it hard to see the overall pattern.
Abuse can also be hidden in ways that aren’t physical — emotional manipulation, fear-based control, demanding sex, or threatening to ruin your reputation all harm your well-being just as much as physical violence.
What You Can Do If You See Red Flags
Recognizing these warning signs is the first step toward safety and healing. If you find yourself in a situation that feels unsafe, here are things you can do:
- Talk to someone you trust — a friend, family member, or mentor. Speaking up can clarify what you’re experiencing and help you plan your next steps.
- Reach out for professional support. At Pregnancy Resources of Abilene, our Licensed Professional Counselors can provide confidential, compassionate guidance about relationship concerns, abuse, and emotional stress — whether or not you’re pregnant.
- Create a safety plan. This could include identifying safe places to go, trusted contacts, and practical steps for leaving an unsafe situation.
- Know your community resources. Local hotlines (LINK OR NUMBER?), shelters, and counseling services are available to help you identify your options and support you without judgment.
You Don’t Have to Face This Alone
Dating violence doesn’t reflect your worth or strength. It reflects a pattern of harmful behavior by someone else — and you deserve to be valued, safe, and respected in all relationships.
Pregnancy Resources of Abilene is here to walk with you through emotional challenges, including issues around abuse, stress, and relationship concerns. Our services are free, confidential, and supportive, and you don’t need to be pregnant to access counseling services. If you notice red flags in your relationship or just feel overwhelmed, reach out to our experienced team.